Subtitle: Things That Should Have Killed Me
A friend and I were talking the other day about floating in the gutter water after a big rainstorm. We didn’t grow up in the same neighborhood, nor in the same time (I’m 6 years older), but floating in the gutter after a rainstorm seems to be one of those shared suburban youth experiences. Today, we’re both a little disgusted by the thought of gutter water, which led me thinking about all the stupid stuff I did as a kid. Here’s a list:
- Crawling through the sewer lines.
- Doing cartwheels and back handsprings on the pitch of the roof of our house.
- Running directly behind the mosquito spray truck, on purpose.
- Swinging on the swing set as high as I could and then trying to do a front-sommie after jumping out of the swing.
- Joining the diving team—I was ill-prepared for the power of the board and hit my head.
- Jumping from the skeletal second floors of barely constructed houses that were always popping up behind our home.
- Trying out for a professional tumbling group that performed for circuses, in which I was expected to climb three people high and then do a back flip off the last person’s shoulders. I wasn’t invited back.
Somewhere along the line, probably around the age of 13, my stupid kid tricks turned to stupid adolescent adventures that are better left undocumented. Suffice it to say that one involved getting high with a guy known only as The Colonel.
Feel free to share yours.